Roz Tandy

I became a caregiver at ten when my older siblings and I began helping care for our grandmother. We had just moved to North Carolina from Connecticut to live with an aunt due to the death of our mom who was our single surviving parent. Our grandmother had suffered a stroke and was unable to walk and care for herself. Fortunately, a strong, cohesive circle of family and friends were on hand to help. This is far too often not the case for too many caregivers who often feel and, are in this alone. Even when others have promised and periodically follow-through, the bulk of caregiving still falls on the faithful few.

My personal baptism-by-fire continued to emerge by helping family elders take care of those within our family and in our community. Taking care of two aunts with dementia gave me great training and led to the opening of my personal care home, Magnolia Lane. It is specifically for elderly women and has been in operation nearly ten years. This has afforded me even greater insight into the plight of caregivers.

The workshop I created entitled, “I’m Still Here”, serves as an access route to share my experiences and advocate for the many who find themselves in this role. One major lesson I’ve learned is not to sanitize sensitive topics such as burnout, abuse or making a decision to place a loved one in a long-term care facility. Honestly discussing these issues, grants caregivers some relative peace-of-mind. It gives us a broader permission to pay attention to our own needs which can allow us to seek the assistance needed for our own well-being.